Sometimes we can spend so much time making plans in our heads and learn later, planning simply wasn’t necessary. Instead, rather, we can take things an hour at a time, even a day at a time, to create joyful moments and a promise of tomorrow. After all, that is one of the primary principles of yoga, isn’t it?

Today, I am sitting in the promise of tomorrow, as tomorrow I will teach my first yoga class in nearly four months and now have workshops posted on my website. I will post details at the bottom of the blog.

“The Plan”: When I began my total hip replacement recovery in May, ‘the plan’ was to take the deep dive into the philosophies of yoga, to study the ancient texts and to explore meditation deeper than I ever have before. That didn’t happen. Don’t get me wrong. In my recovery, I haven't missed a day practicing the 4th and 7th limbs of yoga: breathwork and meditation. For even after only a few days following surgery, I was practicing asanas (postures) in the chair, or creating a bed yoga sequence for myself as I studied the new mechanics of my brand new joint and began my healing journey. But that planned ‘deep dive’ into yoga took a very curious shift in focus. I began an intense practice of self-study, or Svadyaya, the 4th Niyama (second limb of yoga).

Svadhyaya begins with observation and getting quiet to explore the workings of the heart and the nature of our 'truest' self. Physically, we turn our attention to the condition of our bodies and mental state without judgement. As I diligently showed up to physical therapy two or three times a week and did the daily exercises, I studied my levels of patience, tolerance, and frustration. When I go to PT, I show up to work hard. At the same time, I slowed down enough to let my deep incision heal over time. Turning my attention to observation in physical therapy allowed me to explore the humility and the mechanics of breath and sensation, and helped me to find the fire and discipline I needed to slowly strengthen my newly arranged muscles. We do not have to move through a rigorous asana class to practice yoga. Observation is an important aspect of how we change, grow, and move through difficulties and challenge.

It was a blessing to have the loving support of my husband, who encouraged me to practice this radical self-care and study. With his help, I had time to take a significant deep dive on creating a family tree. In a sense, exploring my ancestry was a different aspect of svadhyaya. We observe our family’s patterns of behavior throughout history. When we can identify some pattens that were positive, we can learn from it. In the same way, when you identify patterns of behavior that are negative, you can begin to consciously break the cycle for the sake of generations to come. It can be transformational if you want it to be.

Working on your ancestry requires a little bit of obsession and tapping into your internal sleuth. The work is infinite, and at no time at the beginning of it do you suspect you are actually undertaking a sacred endeavor. I became a worm digging my way to the center of the earth, as I joined the ancestry sites, sent away my DNA, quizzed my family for clues, ordered birth, marriage, and death certificates and made my way through piles of family photos to post on the family tree. With enough dedication and hard work, the results can be mind-blowing. Here were some of the things I discovered or accomplished while working on my tree:

New family members!

I discovered my dad had a half-brother and a half-sister I never knew about! My paternal grandmother and grandfather were one of the rare couples who were divorced in 1940. As a result, my grandfather and my father were estranged. My dad kept many secrets from me. I had no idea my grandfather was a widow before he met my grandmother. Census reports can be quite revealing. I followed the trail and eventually tracked down three first cousins on the west coast. How amazing! I have had long conversations with a couple of them and had the opportunity to finally talk and learn about my grandfather, an immigrant from Scotland. It has been a miracle in my life to get to know my first cousin, Lori, who is also interested in this ancestry business. Eventually, via posting on a blog board, I met a distant cousin in Scotland via my search and was even made a member of Clan Sutherland in Scotland. My distant cousin in Scotland is the head genealogist and administrator in Clan Sutherland and has helped me track my ancestry back to the 1600’s.

History – This dive into ancestry is also a dive into history. At many points, I was inspired to make my way to Wikipedia articles to learn about Scottish Loyalists, Jacobites, American Pioneers, ancient Scottish and Irish customs, The Irish Potato Famine and so much more.

Family stories - During this time away, I have also found my one of my extended families in Ireland. Via my DNA search, my 1st cousin - 4 times removed (Patrick) came up as a match of interest. Through an email exchange, we figured out that our great, great grandfathers were brothers. Although that side of my family arrived in America 170 years ago, his dad immigrated to the United States from Ireland. Patrick shared many cool stories about my Great Great grandfather, Anthony. Anthony was not only an immigrant from County, Mayo Ireland but was a real live pioneer who took a covered wagon to Gretna, Nebraska.

My cousin Patrick has a webpage set up for the McDonnell side of my family from County, Mayo Ireland. Relatives include those descendants from those who immigrated to Pennsylvania, Nebraska, New Jersey and those McDonnells who remained in Mayo, Ireland. I learned stories about my ancestors’ struggle to survive in Ireland. They were stories of survivors and warriors and greatly moved me to the point where I called these ancestors in meditation. I could ask to be guided and ask for their strength and courage as I healed. I was greeted warmly by many other new/old relatives on the site. My cousins Pat and Ann from Nebraska (who I never knew growing up) posted old photos of my maternal grandmother and grandfather when they were very, very young.

Gifts

Putting together a family tree has helped me with the sacred task of keeping the memory of my ancestors alive. It is a gift that I can pass on to my children and their children. It is a gift that I can give to my husband. While working on Steve’s ancestry, I discovered Steve’s first cousin once removed. Angelo was the son of my husband’s great aunt. We had the gift of meeting Angelo, his wife, Harriet, and granddaughter, Lauren, while they were in town visiting. We spent hours warmly sharing stories, information, photographs, and family treasures. It was one of the highlights of our summer.

The Cycles

In the practice of yoga, we observe our bodies with stillness and the cycles of our breath. In ancestry, we observe the cycles of our ancestors. We can consciously enhance the cycles that serve us, bring love, and joy, or break the family cycles that cause suffering. The knowledge of our Ancestry gives us the power of choice and freedom. Freedom is one of the primary goals of yoga. I found Moksha. And that is what I did on my odd summer break. You?

Looking forward to seeing my students again. I begin tomorrow at Yoga by Degrees as I return to my virtual restorative yoga class at 1:30pm on Saturdays. I also have two workshops on the virtual yoga Sassi Pants Yoga schedule. Join me and Steve for our Autumnal Equinox Celebration with Yin Yoga, Meditation and 108 Aums, Friday, September 23rd at 7pm CT.

Enjoy your life, live well, and be happy!

Kristin